Understanding Bereavement: Navigating the Grieving Process
Loss is a part of life, but that doesn’t make it any easier when it arrives. Whether it's the death of a loved one, a friend, a pet, or even a symbolic loss such as the end of a relationship or life chapter, bereavement can shake the very foundations of our emotional world.
Grief is personal. It doesn’t follow a straight line or fixed timetable. For many, it can feel confusing, overwhelming, or even numb. If you’re grieving right now—or supporting someone who is—know that there’s no “right” way to feel, and help is available.
What Is Bereavement?
Bereavement refers to the period of mourning and adjustment that follows a loss, most often a death. It encompasses the emotional, physical, cognitive, and even spiritual reactions we might experience in response.
Grief, on the other hand, is the emotional response to that loss. This can include sadness, anger, guilt, confusion, loneliness, or even relief—sometimes all in the same day.
How Grief Is Experienced
Grief can affect us in many ways:
Emotionally – You might feel deep sadness, shock, fear, anger, guilt, or longing. Sometimes, you may feel numb or disconnected altogether.
Physically – Grief can cause exhaustion, poor sleep, changes in appetite, tightness in the chest, or difficulty concentrating.
Socially – You might withdraw from others or feel that no one really understands what you’re going through.
Existentially or Spiritually – Grief can bring up big questions about the meaning of life, beliefs, or identity.
These reactions can come in waves, triggered by memories, milestones, or ordinary moments. This ebb and flow is completely natural.
The Myth of the Five Stages
You may have heard of the five stages of grief—denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. While this model can be helpful for some, it's important to remember that grief isn't linear. You might not go through every stage, or you might revisit some multiple times.
Grieving isn’t a checklist. It’s a living process.
Common Themes in Grief
Guilt or “I should have…” thoughts
Regret for things unsaid or undone
Fear of forgetting the person who died
Pressure to ‘move on’ or ‘be strong’ too quickly
Changes in identity, especially after losing a partner, parent, or child
All of these are normal and valid. Sometimes we also experience what’s called complicated grief—where the mourning feels stuck, prolonged, or unbearable. This can be particularly painful and is something therapy can gently support you through.
How Therapy Can Help
Grief can feel isolating, but you don’t have to go through it alone. Therapy provides a safe and non-judgmental space to:
Talk openly about your feelings
Explore your relationship with the person you’ve lost
Make sense of difficult emotions like guilt or anger
Sit with the sadness without being overwhelmed by it
Begin to reconnect with life in your own time
Importantly, therapy doesn’t rush you. It meets you where you are.
There’s No Right Way to Grieve
Your grief is valid, no matter how it looks. Some people cry every day. Others feel strangely functional. Some want to talk. Others don’t know what to say. However you are coping, know that it’s okay.
Grief is love looking for somewhere to go. Over time, with support and compassion, the sharp edges of loss can soften. You might not “get over” the person you’ve lost—but you can learn to carry them with you in a new way.
If You’re Struggling
If you’re feeling lost, overwhelmed, or unsure how to cope with your grief, reaching out for support is a courageous step. You are not alone. Therapy can help you process, honour, and live with your loss at your own pace.
