Misophonia: When Everyday Sounds Feel Unbearable
For most people, sounds like chewing, tapping, or breathing fade into the background.
But for others, those same sounds trigger intense irritation, anxiety, or even rage.
This condition is known as misophonia — literally, “hatred of sound.”
It’s not just about being sensitive or easily annoyed. Misophonia can feel visceral — as if your whole body is being invaded or hijacked by the sound.
It can make daily life, relationships, and social situations deeply challenging.
Understanding misophonia means looking beyond the surface reaction and exploring what’s happening in the nervous system, and why certain sounds feel like a threat.
What Causes Misophonia?
The exact causes aren’t fully understood, but research and clinical experience point to several overlapping factors — neurological, emotional, and developmental.
1. A sensitive nervous system
People with misophonia often have an over-responsive nervous system — one that detects and reacts to threat quickly.
This can be linked to neurodivergence (such as ADHD or autism), where sensory processing differences make sounds feel more intense or intrusive.
For some, the auditory system doesn’t filter background noise in the same way, meaning certain sounds are experienced as unfiltered, sharp, or invasive.
2. Early experiences and trauma
Trauma can also prime the body to perceive danger where there is none.
If you grew up in an unpredictable or unsafe environment, your body may have learned to stay hypervigilant — listening for subtle cues of threat, tension, or anger.
A sound that once signalled danger — like someone sighing, shouting, or chewing aggressively — may now automatically trigger a fight/flight response, even in safe situations.
In this way, misophonia can be both a sensory and emotional memory.
The sound acts like a key that unlocks the body’s stored stress response.
3. Associative learning
Sometimes misophonia develops through association.
If a specific sound became linked to conflict, shame, or powerlessness, your nervous system remembers — even when your mind forgets.
The body says, “this sound means danger,” and reacts before you can think.
How It Relates to ADHD, Autism, and Trauma
In ADHD, the brain’s attentional filter can struggle to prioritise sensory input. A ticking clock or tapping pen that others tune out becomes impossible to ignore. The frustration can escalate into anger or distress.
In Autism, there’s often sensory hypersensitivity — sounds, lights, or textures register more strongly. Misophonia can overlap with this sensitivity but carries an added emotional charge, often linked to overwhelm or the need for control and predictability.
In Trauma, misophonia can represent a triggered survival response. The sound reactivates implicit memories of fear, invasion, or threat. The body prepares to defend itself, even though the danger is no longer present.
In all three, the common thread is nervous system dysregulation — a system that has learned to be on alert and struggles to settle when overstimulated.
Healing Misophonia: Soothing the Threat Response
There’s no quick fix, but healing is possible.
The goal is not to eliminate sensitivity, but to help the nervous system feel safe again.
1. Name the experience
Understanding that misophonia is a body-based stress response — not a personal flaw — can immediately reduce shame and self-criticism.
It’s not “overreacting”; it’s your system trying to protect you.
2. Regulate before exposure
Trying to “tough it out” usually backfires.
Instead, start with grounding and regulation: slow breathing, gentle movement, or feeling your feet on the floor.
Once your body feels more settled, you can experiment with tolerating mild triggers in small, safe doses.
3. Soothing through sensation
Some people find it helpful to balance overwhelming auditory input with other sensations — listening to white noise, wearing ear defenders, or using tactile grounding (holding something textured, stroking the skin, or feeling the weight of a blanket).
4. Explore the emotional roots
In therapy, you might explore what the triggering sounds represent.
Sometimes, beneath the irritation lies a younger part of us that felt trapped, invaded, or unheard.
When that part of you is acknowledged and soothed, the intensity of the reaction often softens.
5. Work with body-based approaches
Because misophonia is a nervous system issue, body-oriented therapies — such as Somatic Experiencing, Sensorimotor Psychotherapy, or Polyvagal-informed approaches — can be especially effective.
They help the body complete old fight/flight responses and re-establish a sense of internal safety.
Finding Safety in Sensitivity
If you live with misophonia, it’s important to remember: sensitivity is not weakness.
The same nervous system that registers threat so vividly is also capable of deep empathy, intuition, and creativity.
Healing misophonia doesn’t mean dulling those sensitivities — it means retraining the body to trust the present moment.
When the nervous system learns that it’s safe again, sound becomes just sound — not a signal of danger, but part of the world you can inhabit fully and calmly.
